For the first time in human history kids are being brought up in a social media society. We are just now beginning to see the lasting repercussions of the information age. Children are being raised by the internet and the statistics are startling. To understand the problems we are facing today lets take a look at a few of the culprits.
We live in the attention economy: the more time and attention given to screens, the more ad revenue that you generate for the various online companies. According to Cal Newport in his book Digital Minimalism, tech companies are doing everything in their power to capitalize off of your eyes, “People don’t succumb to screens because they’re lazy, but instead because billions of dollars have been invested to make this outcome inevitable.”[1] These sites and apps are specifically engineered to keep you engaged in the product. Devices have become so addictive that the average American spends seven hours[2] a day on their phone. Believe it or not, my grandparents spent a grand total of zero hours a day on their phone. What a stark contrast. This is not normal, nor is it healthy.
The internet and social media in particular scratch two very important psychological itches: intermittent positive reinforcement and the drive for social approval.[3] Apps are littered with intermittent content that keeps our brains on high alert, constantly wanting more. Ever wondered why a post you want to see is at the top of the screen when you open up an app only to have it whisked away? You’ve got a lot more content to scroll through to see that post again. How many hours of our life are lost in this trap? Yet the greater factors are the social and psychological impacts these apps have on our hearts and minds. Upon arrival, Facebook, was simply a way to keep up with friends and family via the internet. This use was completely flipped on its head with the introduction of the “like” button. Gone are the days of a brief life update in your friends world; now the focus is all on you. Who is paying attention to me? Who cares about what I’m doing. Narcissism has completely taken over. We now constantly check our device to see who is interacting with our posts, desperate for man’s approval.
Our relationships with our devices are also generating cases of extreme stress and anxiety. There is “a correlation between frequency of attention switching and stress.”[4] According to studies done by Gloria Mark, PhD, the average attention span, when focusing on a screen related task, decreased from two and a half minutes in 2004 to seventy-five seconds in 2012; it has again decreased by almost half, to roughly forty-seven seconds today[5]. The numbers continue to decline by age. Children who are raised by their devices are prone to experience crippling anxiety and stress levels attached to a non-existent attention span.
This is a huge problem for Christians; if we allow ourselves to be consumed by our devices, then we will undoubtedly be ineffective in the mission we have been given. If we are to make disciples of all nations, then we cannot be obsessed with ourselves. If we are to reach the nations, then we must live in victory over stress and anxiety. How are we to be workmen in the word, how are we to delight in and meditate on the book if we cannot give attention to it? We are barely scratching the surface on the effects of the internet on our hearts and minds.
Now that we are aware of the problem, we can move forward with a solution. In 1 Peter 5:8 we get some insight into the plan of the devil for you and your family: “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:” He is seeking total annihilation. Fortunately, Peter gives some biblical principles to properly deal with the adversary. These principles give great insight for guarding against the dangers of the internet.
Be Sober
We must be sober minded when approaching the affairs of this life. If we allow ourselves to be drunk on the desires of our flesh then we will be incapable of being lead by the Spirit. To be sober is to be filled with the Spirit,[6] fully yielded to the leading of the word of God and Spirit of God at all times. To be sober is to be of a sound mind, the contrast of someone that’s insane.[7] If we aren’t sober minded then we can easily be taken by the current of the day. Like a mad man, unable to control ourselves, habitually yielding to the desires of the flesh. It is very easy to squander your life looking at pixels on a screen. If allowed, you can be certain your children will find themselves caught in this same snare. Wasting their developmental years consuming content, leaving them empty, anxious, and depressed. We must be sober-minded when considering what we will and will not allow in the lives of our children. They don’t know what’s best for them; you do. As Andy Crouch put it in his book The Tech-Wise Family, we must “find the proper place for technology in our family lives - and how to keep it there.”[8] Consider setting boundaries, have a plan of action in how your family will approach the internet and social media in a sober way.
Be Vigilant
Along with the sobriety comes the need to be vigilant. This is to be awake and watchful, knowing that we have an enemy with an intent to consume us. If we lose sight of the spiritual battle we are in, then we will most certainly fall prey to the enemy. Being vigilant means we have an eternal perspective at all times in all things. As parents, we must take the word of Paul in 1 Corinthians 16:13 seriously, “Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong.” Vigilance is the key to keeping watch over your family. It should be no surprise that your children have been marked by the enemy. They encounter immense spiritual warfare, and many times this is encountered through the screen on their phone. As a wise man once said, the best way to educate the masses is to entertain them. Do you know who they follow, what channels they are subscribed to? Are you aware of the music they are listening to? While they may not be able to understand it, there is a battle for their soul and their device is ground zero. If you are not actively engaged in your children’s digital life, then you can be certain the enemy is. Vigilance is being brutally honest with yourself, knowing the dangers present, and protecting your children accordingly. A good shepherd won’t passively tend the flock, he is vigilant, looking out for the wolf knowing that he is always near.
If we are not sober and vigilant in our digital lives, then you can guarantee that we will be devoured by our enemy. The Bible very clearly states that the goal is to consume you. If you are not operating with these principles in your home, then you can be assured that your children will find themselves swallowed up in sin.
Get Into The Book
As Christians we must be in the word of God daily. The word of God gives us the proper lens to lead and guide our children in vigilance and sobriety. With God’s instruction for life, we have the ability to approach the internet with a biblical mindset. Free from doomscrolling and the endless pursuit of the next dopamine hit. Meeting with God in his word is the most crucial element to our walk with the Lord. Consider this, through the word of God we have the opportunity to fellowship with God daily. This is truly a paradigm shifting revelation, that the creator of all, the King of kings and Lord of lords would account you and I worthy of his fellowship. Not only that but we have been given truth from God in a way that anyone can understand. This is for the common man, this relationship is so attainable that anyone can do it. Simply get into the word of God daily and respond back to God in prayer. As we get into the word, the word gets into us.[9] The word of God prunes us, molding and shaping us into the image of Jesus Christ, and this cleansing takes place as we daily spend time in the book.[10] If we are daily delighting in and meditating on the word of God then we are likened to a prosperous tree with an endless source of life.[11] We need God’s word to penetrate every fiber of our being so that we would be transformed by it’s power.[12] This process of sanctification is not possible if we are not men and women of the book. This is a caught and taught behavior. If we are modeling this in the home then you can be certain it will have much more validity when we teach our children the importance of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. If we first live out what we are desiring for our children then it is not a stretch for them to follow suit. If we can lead our children into an intimate relationship with God through His word and prayer, the battle for their attention is weakened. When they find their identity and purpose in Christ, the facade of this life begins to fade and they can live above the influence of this world.
Memorize the Book
One final principle to consider is our need for the word of God to be deeply rooted in our heart. In order to be sober and vigilant in our daily lives, we must have God’s word hidden in our heart. This is the ammo in our battle against the devil. The bible is clear on our need for memorization as the psalmist tells us “Thy word have I hid in mine heart, That I might not sin against thee.”[13] If we want to walk in victory over sin, then we must be diligent to memorize scripture. Jesus himself, the very word of God perfectly illustrates our need for memorization in Matthew 4 after his forty day fast. The devil tempts him three times, and each time Jesus responds with “It is written”. What powerful words for us to get ahold of. It is written. Anything Jesus would have said in this moment would have been the word of God. However, He is demonstrating the point, you do not need something new to overcome the world, you just simply need the written word of God. Get in the book, study it, memorize it, live it, love it. The solution to our struggles is found in the word of God, we would be wise to have it tucked away in our heart so that we can call on the testimony of scripture in our time of need. When we preach the word to ourselves we will experience victory just as Jesus did, “Then the devil leaveth him.”[14] As parents we must make our homes a billboard for the book, write it on the walls, post it on your mirrors, read it regularly, memorize it daily.[15] If we prioritize the word of God in our homes, then our families will be much more equipped for dealing with the temptations presented online. As parents it is our responsibility to imbed the bible into the hearts and minds of our children so they can stand firm on the authority of scripture in the day of temptation. Consider a verse of the week that you can memorize together.
Despite the spiritual war that we are caught up in, we have been given the word of God to help us navigate these turbulent times. If we will lead and guide our homes with soberness and vigilance, deeply rooting scripture in the hearts and minds of our children, then we are fully equipped, having the necessary tools to protect our children from the dangers of the internet and technology.
Mason Wilson is the pastor of discipleship at Harvest Baptist Church in Iola, KS.
[1] Newport, C. (2021) Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World. London: Penguin Books.
[2] https://www.comparitech.com/tv-streaming/screen-time-statistics/
[3] Newport, C. (2021) Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World. London: Penguin Books.
[4] https://www.apa.org/news/podcasts/speaking-of-psychology/attention-spans
[5] https://www.apa.org/news/podcasts/speaking-of-psychology/attention-spans
[6] Ephesians 5:18
[7] Acts 26:25
[8] Crouch, Andy (2017) The Tech-Wise Family: Everyday Steps for Putting Technology in Its Proper Place. Grand Rapids: Baker Books
[9] Hebrews 12:12
[10] John 15:1-3
[11] Psalm 1
[12] Romans 12:2
[13] Psalm 119:11
[14] Matthew 4:11
[15] Deuteronomy 6:6–9, Joshua 1:8
